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Personal

Tuesday, May 30, 2017

Deaths Of Despair

image: Depression

The mental health of the unemployed deteriorates the longer they are out of work and this is a barrier to securing future employment, research has found. While different ways to reach this group are being trialled, no solution is firmly in sight.
- Daily Mercury, Feb 9, 2016

1st Scientific Analysis of Suicide Notes Lends Insights into the Heartbreaking Act

By Philip Perry
Big Think
April 4, 2017

For decades, the mortality rate across the US WAS IN DECLINE. That’s why the results of a 2015 report were so shocking. For the first time in generations, middle-aged white people saw their death rate increase. Husband and wife economists Anne Case and Angus Deaton discovered this disturbing trend, which began back in 1999. The researchers labeled these “deaths of despair,” resulting from SUICIDE, drug or alcohol abuse.

Approximately 40,000 PEOPLE take their own lives each year in the US. A NEW BOOK tries to isolate the origins of the uptick, currently at a 30-year high, and what can be done. The upward trend was found in all age groups, absent the elderly. Now a new book is lending greater insights into this most personal of tragic acts. Its entitled Explaining Suicide: Patterns, Motivations and What Notes Reveal. The authors say this is the first sweeping, analytical attempt to understand the motivations behind the act, across different age groups.

A multidisciplinary team of academics was involved in this study. They were psychology professor Cheryl Meyer at Wright State University, psychologist Taronish Irani at SUNY-Buffalo State, historian Katherine Hermes at Central Connecticut University, and the late Betty Yung, who was an associate professor of psychology at Wright State University. They wanted to obtain a holistic view using psychology, history, and the social sciences to tackle suicide.

To conduct the study, which would form the basis of the book, researchers examined suicide datasets extensively, including from places as far away as Europe and Oceania. They also collected 1,280 suicide notes from coronerҒs offices across Southwestern Ohio, written between 2000 and 2009. These werent all notes in the literal sense. Many were pictures of notes written on mirrors, towels, coffee filters, and more. One man even spray painted his note on the floor of his barn.

Last words such as these are only found in 14% of cases. The authors began to notice differences between note leavers and non-leavers in their research, as well as people who attempt suicide and those who complete the act. They believe these findings could help develop better suicide prevention strategies.

The academics also evaluated motivating factors, and to what extent each is capable of pushing a person toward suicide. These included: mental illness, substance abuse, interpersonal violence, physical pain, grief, and feelings of failure. They also explored what factors may help protect one against suicide, and make them more resilient. Meyer said after reading all the notes and examining the data, she knew they had a book on their hands.

Many notes were addressed to one person. Others were to no one in particular. There was even someone who addressed the note to their dog. Meyer said it’s hard to understand why some people leave a note and others don’t. According to their research, it all comes down to WHAT MOTIVATED the suicide.

There is a faction of note leavers who lash out at the person or group who controlled, manipulated, neglected, or abused them. But most absolve loved ones of any guilt. 70% were motivated to escape overbearing pain, be it physical or psychological. Nowadays, being a white male is the single biggest risk factor. WHY IS THAT? According to Case and Deaton, drastic changes in the LABOR MARKET is the MOST SIGNIFICANT factor. Meyer claims another driver.

“Hegemonic masculinity,” or a perception that heightened MASCULINITY must be portrayed at all times, a goal that no male can live up to. Sooner or later everyone needs to be vulnerable and let their emotions out. This inability to fit into such a rigid framework causes psychological pain in the form of guilt, shame, disgust, and self-hatred. This builds to the point where the person can no longer take it.

Another 23% of note writers ended it all due to unrequited love or love lost. 22% said they themselves created the problem which led to their decision. This includes the loss of a job, a breakup or divorce, legal troubles, arrest or an impending jail sentence, a looming financial problem, or a devastating medical diagnosis. Meyer says thereԒs a correlation between legal troubles and taking ones own life. “There is a really strong tie between things like DUIs and killing yourself,” she said.

The vast majority of notes absolved love ones, saying nothing could have been done to prevent the act. Most people who commit suicide find their own pain too overwhelming to bear. About a third of the notes mention religion, faith, or God. More women left notes than men. And oddly enough, more of the notes were written on the first of the month than any other day.

ItҒs unfortunate that many people have been touched by suicide in one way or another, yet most are resistant to talking about it. The authors hope the book will help those who are wrestling with it, or who have been hurt by someone who committed it, to speak out, and seek help. So what can we do to help lower instances of suicide? Meyer suggests limiting access to guns, dangerous pharmaceuticals, and other common means.

She also thinks everyone should take a course, much like how we go through driverӒs ed. to acquire a driverԒs license. Every student would be taught to recognize the warning signs and know how to get the person the help they need. Adults in higher or continuing education or the elderly in senior centers could also be offered such a course.

The biggest preventative aspect according to Meyer, rather than sense of resiliency, is acquiring more social connections and developing ones own sense of purpose. Those who feel isolated or adrift are more likely to consider suicide. “Part of it is the responsibility of the individual, but part of it is our responsibility of keeping that person connected,” she said. We usually perceive the warning signs, but don’t feel it’s right to interfere.

“In the coroners’ reports that we viewed, many people had called for welfare checks on their loved ones. They knew or feared that the person had harmed or killed himself or herself. If the impulse to intervene had occurred at an earlier point, the suicide might have been interrupted and averted. We must learn to trust our guts and to get past our own fears when someone is in trouble and in need of help.”

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Posted by Elvis on 05/30/17 •
Section Dying America • Section Spiritual Diversions • Section Personal
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Tuesday, March 21, 2017

Hopeless in 2017

wish_i_were_dead.jpg

Losing your job at 50 or 60 is not good for your health.  There is compelling evidence that no matter who you compare the older job loser to, he or she does worse physically and mentally.
- Why Stress Is Making You Sick - William Gallo, Yale University School of Medicine, AARP, May 2009

Day-to-day, the single-most intimidating OBSTACLE I face is not the unemployment rate or another round of hapless job interviews, but ATTACHING AN IDENTITY to THE MAN I make eye contact with each morning in the vanity mirror.
- Trials of a Stay-At-Home Boyfriend - Salon, March 13, 2012

| I began to doubt my ability to find another full-time job.” Being fired from a job that you’ve poured your heart and soul into can be particularly gut-wrenching. “I don’t get involved with people like I used to,” he says. “I probably never recovered from that layoff. It was like family.”
- Life Aftert Layoff - Discarded and Demorazlized - September 4, 2006

While older workers are less likely to be laid off than younger workers, they are about half as likely to be rehired. One result is that older workers have seen the largest proportionate increase in unemployment in this downturn. The number of unemployed people between ages 50 and 65 has more than doubled… The prospects for the re-employment of older workers deteriorate sharply the longer they are unemployed. A worker between ages 50 and 61 who has been unemployed for 17 months has only about a 9 percent chance of finding a new job in the next three months.
- The Human Disater of Unemployment - NY Times, May 12, 2012

---

And Now, a Few Words From the Long-Term Unemployed

By Hamilton Nolan
Gawker

lmost four million Americans officially suffer from long-term unemployment. Unable to secure any meaningful legislation to help them, President Obama is reduced to begging corporations to pledge not to discriminate against them. What is long term unemployment like?

In tonight’s State of the Union address, Obama will doubtless take a stab at describing the plight of those out of work for many months or years, as a prelude to the announcement that he “has secured pledges from a number of major U.S. employers to adopt hiring policies that discourage discrimination against the long-term unemployed.” That’s a paltry remedy to a crushing problem.

Throughout the course of our 40-volume Unemployment Stories series, we heard dozens of people speak of the financial, social, and psychological trauma that accompanies long term unemployment. We have quite a few stories that we didn’t have a chance to run in that series. We’ll share a few with you now. Here, some words from America’s long term unemployed:

Defeat

I’m an art director. I knew pursuing a career in art was going to be a rocky road when I was a kid. I worked hard, went to art school, paid my dues, found success. Even as a freelancer, I could always find work. It’s typical in these pieces to mention the level of your previous success. I usually just tell folks that they’ve probably seen my work somewhere. Advertising is like that.

That seems like another world now. At this stage of my extended unemployment, I’ll do anything. Digging ditches, washing dishes, I don’t care so long as there’s some sort of paycheck.

The worst part of extended unemployment is a sense that people blame you for it. As if somehow you’re choosing this. Anything you may have achieved before is irrelevant. Now you’re lazy, unmotivated, a drain on the system and the target of all sorts of condescending unsolicited advice. Gosh, thank you! I hadn’t considered applying at Wal-Mart, the gas station, Jenny’s diner. Wow! There are job fairs?!? OMG! I had NO idea!!! I’ve been too busy enjoying my life of luxurious relaxation. Go back to school! Brilliant! Not only will my bankruptcy make it tough but I can destroy my credit even more while becoming even more overqualified to be a stockboy!

After a while, it doesn’t matter how well meaning the would be job counselors might be. All of it makes you feel less than human.

After a while, you drop out of everything. When friends and family decide to get together someplace you opt out. It’s too humiliating when you can’t afford a glass of soda. Besides, how many times can you listen to someone tell you there’s a job fair going on at some hotel conference room?

Even positive activities become points of criticism. You ran five miles? How much did that pay? You watched the game? Bet you made a lot of money doing that!

It’s NEARLY IMPOSSIBLE TO STAY POSITIVE. Low level depression is a constant state. Regular rejection attacks your self image. You begin to doubt all the habits you built up to become successful, no matter how successful you were.

At any given moment you waver between giving up completely or absolutely losing your temper. Maintaining an even keel is exhausting.

You lose so much more than a job with extended unemployment. You feel like you lose the things that make us people. Not just money, a home, independence… you lose your value as a person.

When you finally come to the point where you realize you’ll take a minimum wage position you know that such a job won’t provide for any kind of life… you’ll be lucky to pay for transportation to get to and from work.

You can’t vent your frustration. If you do, you simply prove to others that you’re not worthy, you’re not trying, you don’t want a job, you’re a screw up, you’ve already decided you’re defeated.

Defeat is a great word to sum up the experience. Talk politics, economics, strategies, psychology… doesn’t matter when you get turned down for yet another job. Day after day, month after month, year after year, defeat. You lose.

How remarkable is it that people who deal with exactly that reality set their alarms every day? Find a way to get online, submit resumes day after day, put on a brave face and find a way to get through it all? Dig deep and smile when people mention that they saw on the news x or y company is hiring two hundred people?

Most of us are so far past any sort of reasonable breaking point even we can’t tell you how we continue. Press any of us about it and we’ll say ‘what choice do we have?!?’

Reality kicks you in the teeth

I’ve read the unemployment stories and many of them reflect my own.Even though it may be repetitive to writethese words I still feel the compulsion to writethem down and share them with you.

In thinking about laying out the facts of my story, I do realize that a lot of it is my own fault.Some might say “no”, but that’s how it seems to me.I went to college and for the longest time I didn’t know what I wanted to do.I had walked a very long and crooked road to try to find something that I could do with even a little competence and enjoyment.I started in the math and science area.I could barely get passed even the most remedial areas.Then I tried the technical college.I could barely hack it there.Finally, I found that in the English department was where I could do my best and so I went on to study both professional and creative writing.

I had thought that I might get into an entry level position where my skills might have been of some use.Sadly, that wasn’t the case.I searched and searched and searched.The days turned to weeks.The months bled into two years.I couldn’t even land jobs washing dishes, washing cars or cleaning toilets despite my willingness to do those jobs.

And there wasn’t a lot of support for this.

One of my family members even said to me, “If things don’t change in five years, you might as well kill yourself.”

And during that time, I was living at home because of the fact that I had no income source to find any kind of home of my own.Then to make matters worse, my mother was diagnosed with cirrhosis of the liver.And she passed away within a month.

She had no will or life insurance and so, her house (the home I was living in) went back to the bank along with her car.It was only by the purest good fortune that my eldest brother allowed me to live with him out in California.

I did try to remain optimistic about coming to California, thinking that this would be a new chapter in my life and that I would continue to soldier on in the face of my mother’s passing.But, once again, reality kicks you in the teeth.I searched and searched and searched.Days turned to weeks and the weeks bled into months and still nothing.I’ve applied to be a dishwasher at Chili’s, a night time stocker at Toys R Us and many others.Still nothing.Even people at the temp agencies and staffing centers said that they couldn’t help me.That in itself almost seems like a sign to give up, doesn’t it?

Already, I know that there are those out there who would tell me that this is my own fault because I had chosen a degree in an area that is pretty much useless.I’d be willing to concede that.On the other hand, when it comes to jobs listings at job sites and company sites constantly say that they want experience.But to get experience one must have a job.And so the vicious nonsensical merry-go-round continues to spin.

It’s at times like this that I start to think of the writers and artists who’ve come before me:Kurt Cobain, Ernest Hemingway, Sylvia Plath, Vincent Van Gough, Hunter S. Thompson, Spalding Gray and Richard Jeni and the question that I find myself asking is, ”DID THEY HAVE THE RIGHT IDEA at the END OF THEIR LIVES?”

Signed,

The Failed Writer

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Posted by Elvis on 03/21/17 •
Section Dying America • Section Personal
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Wednesday, December 21, 2016

The INFJ Male

image: infj
The Plight of Being the Incredibly Rare INFJ Male

By Personality Growth

We all know that INFJs are rare folks, with rich inner minds and a surprising way of reacting to the world around them. INFJ males are even less common, and because of this they are often faced with unique struggles. Being different can leave them feeling alienated from the world around them, and even cause them to experience certain levels of self-doubt. Here are a few things that make the INFJ male both unique and incredible.

They Dont Fit Into Traditional Roles

INFJs in general simply do not fit into traditional roles most of the time. They follow their own set of morals and beliefs, and dislike being shoved into a box. They will often push against anything that is traditional, simply because they donҒt enjoy not being allowed to be themselves. They also despise when other people are forced into a role that does not make them happy. INFJs believe in standing up for people, which can often make them appear different from others. They often do not fit into what society believes is rightӔ or normalӔ and will definitely go their own way.

This type of ideal can sometimes be difficult for INFJs, especially male INFJs. They do not always fit into the stereotypical image of what a man should beӔ and will often have their own unique way of looking at things. This doesnt mean that an INFJ male wonҒt still possess many of the typical male thought patterns and behaviors, but they simply appear more like a lone wolf in many ways. They often do not stand for other peoples sometimes selfish actions, and are much more in tune the emotions of others.

They Are In Touch With Their Emotions

INFJs are in touch with a more emotional side to themselves, even INFJ males. This can be seen as strange, since it doesnt fit into societies somewhat ridiculous idea of how men should behave. They are not overly emotional individuals by any means, and often prefer to keep their feelings to themselves. They are independent and private, which makes their emotional side only visible to those closest to them. INFJ males do however have a rather compassionate nature, and will come to the aid of those in need. They enjoy helping people when they are in pain, and want to be there for people as much as they can. They are in touch with the world around them, and might even come to someoneҒs defense if they are being bullied or hassled. This sense of caring and consideration makes them strong individuals, who are comfortable with emotions instead of terrified of them. In many cases the people around them will truly appreciate this warmth, making them AMAZING FRIENDS AND PARTNERS IN LIFE. At a younger age though, this sense of compassion can get the INFJ into trouble themselves. It takes people who understand them to fully appreciate their depth and sensitivity.

They Are Nurturing

NFJs are very nurturing people, who enjoy taking time to help others. They will not shy away from someone who is hurting, and will often be willing to comfort them. This is not always connected to typical male behavior, which can sometimes be confusing to others. INFJs males might even feel the need to stifle these qualities when they are younger, in order to fit in. They are in touch with the emotions of others, and truly care about people. They want to do whatever they can to help and to make a real difference in the world around them. This feeling often begins at a very young age, which will often leave the INFJ feeling completely alienated from most people around them.

They often do connect with their masculine side and enjoy having time with their male friends. The issues arise when they are around friends who are boastful and enjoy acting deplorable or obnoxious. The INFJ will often be more than willing to speak up against this behavior, especially if it is deemed as an injustice to someone else. They do best around friends who are sincere people, not simply show-offs looking to impress others.

They Keep to Themselves Most of the Time

INFJs are independent and introverted people, who enjoy plenty of time to themselves. This means that even in college or during their younger years, many INFJ males probably preferred to spend time with their favorite people, rather than go to a raging party. When they do attend these types of events they often find themselves wishing they had not gone against their better judgment. They prefer quiet time, often reading or absorbing something that they truly enjoy. This may cause the INFJ male to appear rather different than the typical outgoing, excitement driven male. This is often more of a struggle during their younger years, when it is seems important to be social and in many waysobnoxious. INFJs arenŒt like that, and would prefer to spend time focusing on real encounters.

INFJs can sometimes appear moody or distant, simply because they require time to themselves. Sometimes they are feeling drained, and need to separate themselves from others. This can be confusing, since they are actually very empathetic and warm people. They are emotionally driven, but they are also extremely logical individuals. They need time to think and process things on their own, which can throw people off sometimes. This need for alone time and space, might cause the people who care for them to become hurt. This can also be a struggle for an INFJ male, since most of the time people are expecting a man to be aggressive by nature. INFJ males are capable of going after what they want, but they arent always extremely forward and aggressive about it. They will express themselves, but they wonҒt push people if they seem resistant.

They Dislike Anything Shallow, But They Contradict Themselves

NFJs often feel out of place and like they dont fit in with many others. They are unique and rare people, especially the unbelievably rare INFJ male. They often feel disconnected from what people expect them to be, simply because they are some of the most uncommon individuals on the planet. Their way of thinking and processing their world is very different from many other people. They dislike anything shallow, and will often want to avoid the typical ғfun activities that others might enjoy. INFJs want to make real and lasting connections, and might even hate the idea of continuous one night stands. Many times this will cause the INFJ to appear odd to others, since they would prefer to let people into their lives who truly deserve to be there. They donԒt want to spend time conversing in small talk, and would much rather share in a deep meaningful conversation with others.

INFJs males enjoy aesthetics, but also hate anything shallow. They fit into the continuously baffling INFJ paradox, and will often contradict themselves to outsiders. They simply are complex people, who have a depth inside of them that is not visible to others. They do care about how they look, and might be extremely hard on themselves when it comes to appearance. At the same time they hate anything superficial, and want much more depth than most people are willing to offer.

INFJ males will often hide their less stereotypical male qualities, instead of allowing others to see them. Because of the way the world operates they might feel afraid to be completely open at a young age. This leads to a rather unhappy INFJ, since they will feel alone and completely insincere. It is vital for an INFJ to be true to themselves, so hiding in this way can be very bad for them. Feeling like they have to keep their true nature a secret, can cause them to recluse into themselves completely. They might even find themselves apathetic and incapable of operating in the world around them. When they arent allowed to be themselves and let their less common qualities shine, the INFJ is simply not being true to who they really are. It is vital for them to find people who cherish their qualities, and who appreciate how unique and special they are. When they finally do get around people like this, the INFJ simply needs to become open with themselves in order to begin to shine. If they arenҒt allowed to live up to their full potential, their incredible inner light will fade away.

They Make Incredible Partners In Life

The INFJ male might be incredibly rare, but they are also very special. They have a connection to others, and are warm but also thoughtful people. Their ability to be compassionate makes them wonderful friends and romantic partners. They have both feminine and masculine qualities, which make for an almost perfect balance- one that lets face it, we are all kind of hoping for in a partner. They possess many different qualities that can often be confusing until you dive deep into their soul to learn everything that makes them who they are. Once you are allowed into the world of an INFJ, do not take that for granted. They might have their stubborn moments, they might drive you crazy when they desire to be rebellious- but they are warm, loving and amazingly understanding people. They are hopeless romantics at heart, who sometimes desire to hide that part of themselves away. It is important to help your INFJ and keep them from hiding their light. Cherish them, and appreciate the qualities that make them so unique- they will definitely thank you for it.

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Posted by Elvis on 12/21/16 •
Section Personal
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Wednesday, September 07, 2016

The Ultimate Selishness Or Not?

suicide is always an option

There’s Nothing Selfish About Suicide

By Katie Hurley
Author, The Happy Kid Handbook
August 14, 2014

I am a survivor of suicide.

I don’t talk about it a lot these days, as I’ve reached the point where it feels like a lifetime ago. Healing was a long and grief-stricken process. There were times when I felt very alone in my grief and there were times when I felt lost and confused. The trouble with suicide is that no one knows what to say. No one knows how to react. So they smile and wave and attempt distraction… but they never ever say the word. The survivors, it seems, are often left to survive on their own.

I experienced endless waves of emotion in the days, weeks, months and even years following the loss of my father. The “what ifs” kept me up at night, causing me to float through each day in a state of perpetual exhaustion. What if I had answered the phone that night? Would the sound of my voice have changed his mind? Would he have done it at a later date, anyway? Survivor’s guilt, indeed.

Sometimes, I cried. Sometimes, I sat perfectly still watching the waves crash down on Main Beach, hoping for a sign of some kind that he had reached a better place. Sometimes, I silently scolded myself for not seeing the warning signs. Sometimes, I bargained with God or anyone else who might be in charge up there. Bring him back to us. Please, just bring him back. Sometimes I felt angry. Why us? Why me? Why him?

Yes, I experienced a range of emotions before making peace with the loss. But one thought that never ever (not even for one second) crossed my mind was this ill-informed opinion that suicide is selfish. Suicide is a lot of things, but selfish isn’t one of them.

SUICIDE IS A DECISION made out of DESPERATION, HOPELESSNESS, ISOLATION and LONELINESS. The black hole that is clinical depression is all-consuming. Feeling like a burden to loved ones, feeling like there is no way out, feeling trapped and feeling isolated are all common among people who suffer from depression.

People who say that suicide is selfish always reference the survivors. It’s selfish to leave children, spouses and other family members behind, so they say. They’re not thinking about the survivors, or so they would have us believe. What they don’t know is that those very loved ones are the reason many people hang on for just one more day. They do think about the survivors, probably up until the very last moment in many cases. But the soul-crushing depression that envelops them leaves them feeling like there is no alternative. Like the only way to get out is to opt out. And that is a devastating thought to endure.

Until you’ve stared down that level of depression, until you’ve lost your soul to a sea of emptiness and darkness… you don’t get to make those judgments. You might not understand it, and you are certainly entitled to your own feelings, but making those judgments and spreading that kind of negativity won’t help the next person. In fact, it will only hurt others.

As the world mourns the loss of Robin Williams, people everywhere are left feeling helpless and confused. HOW COULD someone who appeared so happy in actuality be so very depressed? The truth is that many, many people face the very same struggle each and every day. Some will commit suicide. Some will attempt. And some will hang on for dear life. Most won’t be able to ask for the help that they need to overcome their mental illness.

You can help.

Know the warning signs for suicide. 50-75% of people who attempt suicide will tell someone about their intention. Listen when people talk. Make eye contact. Convey empathy. And for the love of people everywhere, put down that ridiculous not-so-SmartPhone and be human.

Check in on friends struggling with depression. Even if they don’t answer the phone or come to the door, make an effort to let them know that you are there. Friendship isn’t about saving lost souls; friendship is about listening and being present.

Reach out to survivors of suicide. Practice using the words “suicide” and “depression” so that they roll off the tongue as easily as “unicorns” and “bubble gum.” Listen as they tell their stories. Hold their hands. Be kind with their hearts. And hug them every single time.

Encourage help. Learn about the resources in your area so that you can help friends and loved ones in need. Don’t be afraid to check in over and over again. Don’t be afraid to convey your concern. One human connection can make a big difference in the life of someone struggling with mental illness and/or survivor’s guilt.

30,000 people commit suicide in the United States each year. 750,000 people attempt suicide. It’s time to raise awareness, increase empathy and kindness, and bring those numbers down.

It’s time to talk about suicide and depression.

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Posted by Elvis on 09/07/16 •
Section Dealing with Layoff • Section Personal
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Tuesday, June 14, 2016

Can I Get PTSD From My Job

image: tormented man

Can I Get PTSD From My Job?

By Dr Z.
PTSD Spirituality
January 23, 2010

PTSD can be caused by four broad categories of trauma.  PTSD wounds our souls.  We usually think of rape or military service or natural disasters as causing PTSD.  Yet, a question I sometimes get is, “Can I get PTSD from my civilian job?” (This essay was expanded on 24 Jan 2010)

The short answer is “Yes.”

Does It Matter How I Got PTSD?

PTSD does not care how you got traumatised.  It just cares that you did get traumatised and then it tries to isolate and harm you.  If you get PTSD from a civilian employment situation, you still get to experience the same PTSD symptoms and PTSD-Identity that soldiers and veterans get.

When I listen to military veterans, rape survivors, and others, they almost all exhibit similar PTSD symptoms.  But they all got PTSD producing trauma in individual and different ways.  Hopefully, as American society matures, we will realize the point is not how did I get PTSD, but that I have PTSD.  People who have their souls wounded by PTSD, regardless of how they got it, need our prayers and compassion.  Some of them will also need medical treatment for symptoms.

Compassion Deficit Disorder

When dealing with my own PTSD, and when I help others realize they have value in spite of their PTSD, I still frequently find people (who have usually not suffered much themselves) judging what sort of trauma is worthy of PTSD and hence, their compassion.  If someone is in pain, they are worthy of our compassion.

But what about compassion deniers who themselves suffered from real trauma in their own lives?  Sometime people will suffer from COMPASSION DEFICIT disorder because when they suffered people showed them zero compassion. They were told to just get on with it, or quit whining.  That treatment added to their own suffering.  Unfortunately, they then fell into the trap of treating others with the same lack of compassion.  When we recognise someone elses suffering and can be compassionate, not only do we help them heal, but we heal a little more ourselves.

The PTSD-Identity wants to deny our own need for compassion and it denies that anyone else needs compassion.  It knows that your soul will start to heal if you allow yourself to be compassionate.

PTSD From Civilian Jobs?

f your job routinely involves trauma then you can easily acquire PTSD from your job.  Firefighters, police officers, emergency room technicians and paramedics can all be at heightened risk for PTSD.

Trauma From “Non-Emergency” Jobs?

This has more to do with the work environment, the sort of culture that the company allowed to develop. 

Employment which is high stress, high risk, or with horrible supervisors or co-workers can all cause PTSD in their ways. If your co-workers are sexist or racists, that produces stress.  If your boss is a screamer or sets you up to fail, that is also difficult to deal with.

PTSD risks beyond the job’s culture happens when trauma shows up unexpectedly.  Then PTSD can be acquired in jobs that are not normally considered as emergency work.  In fact, if your job is one that we dont expect to be stressful or traumatic, we can be caught off guard and even more easily harmed when things get horrible.  For example, a bank teller is not an emergency trauma worker.  If there is a shooting in the bank, the tellers can get PTSD.

Harrassment Can Cause PTSD

If your employment culture allows you to be harrassed, then you can get PTSD.  Work place law even recognises that verbal harrassment is a criminal offense and companies have paid substantial fines for allowing it.  Subtle discrimination on the job can also traumatize a person, especially when every job is at risk due to the profit first, people never machinations of Wall Street financiers and moving our manufacturing jobs out of the country.

Harrasment, on the job or not, is always despicable.  In some cases it will traumatise us so deeply as to wound our soul and hinder our ability to have proper relationships.

Business Uncertainty and Unemployment Are Trauma Producing

The recession can cause PTSD for some people.  The stresses of round after round of layoffs is a traumatic experience. It is traumatic to be laid off (fired?) from your job.  It is stressful and traumatic waiting to see if your name is on the next list of people who are dismissed.

Being unemployed can also cause trauma.  Applying for unemployment or welfare is stigmatized in American society.  Even if you lose your job through no fault of your own, people act as if you are a leper. And if you have kids who are members of the “Entitlement Generation,” then not having the money (or the credit) to keep them in clothes and electronics can also be traumatic.

PTSD is Not Inevitable

We are not all fated to get PTSD.  Yet, we are all at risk of being traumatized.  Knowing that it can happen and that PTSD is a normal outcome of trauma can help us more easily heal.

Regardless of how we get the soul wound of PTSD, we still need prayer and hope.  We still need compassion and forgiveness.

SOURCE

Posted by Elvis on 06/14/16 •
Section Dying America • Section Workplace • Section Spiritual Diversions • Section Personal
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