Article 43

 

Personal

Wednesday, December 21, 2016

The INFJ Male

image: infj
The Plight of Being the Incredibly Rare INFJ Male

By Personality Growth

We all know that INFJs are rare folks, with rich inner minds and a surprising way of reacting to the world around them. INFJ males are even less common, and because of this they are often faced with unique struggles. Being different can leave them feeling alienated from the world around them, and even cause them to experience certain levels of self-doubt. Here are a few things that make the INFJ male both unique and incredible.

They Dont Fit Into Traditional Roles

INFJs in general simply do not fit into traditional roles most of the time. They follow their own set of morals and beliefs, and dislike being shoved into a box. They will often push against anything that is traditional, simply because they donҒt enjoy not being allowed to be themselves. They also despise when other people are forced into a role that does not make them happy. INFJs believe in standing up for people, which can often make them appear different from others. They often do not fit into what society believes is rightӔ or normalӔ and will definitely go their own way.

This type of ideal can sometimes be difficult for INFJs, especially male INFJs. They do not always fit into the stereotypical image of what a man should beӔ and will often have their own unique way of looking at things. This doesnt mean that an INFJ male wonҒt still possess many of the typical male thought patterns and behaviors, but they simply appear more like a lone wolf in many ways. They often do not stand for other peoples sometimes selfish actions, and are much more in tune the emotions of others.

They Are In Touch With Their Emotions

INFJs are in touch with a more emotional side to themselves, even INFJ males. This can be seen as strange, since it doesnt fit into societies somewhat ridiculous idea of how men should behave. They are not overly emotional individuals by any means, and often prefer to keep their feelings to themselves. They are independent and private, which makes their emotional side only visible to those closest to them. INFJ males do however have a rather compassionate nature, and will come to the aid of those in need. They enjoy helping people when they are in pain, and want to be there for people as much as they can. They are in touch with the world around them, and might even come to someoneҒs defense if they are being bullied or hassled. This sense of caring and consideration makes them strong individuals, who are comfortable with emotions instead of terrified of them. In many cases the people around them will truly appreciate this warmth, making them AMAZING FRIENDS AND PARTNERS IN LIFE. At a younger age though, this sense of compassion can get the INFJ into trouble themselves. It takes people who understand them to fully appreciate their depth and sensitivity.

They Are Nurturing

NFJs are very nurturing people, who enjoy taking time to help others. They will not shy away from someone who is hurting, and will often be willing to comfort them. This is not always connected to typical male behavior, which can sometimes be confusing to others. INFJs males might even feel the need to stifle these qualities when they are younger, in order to fit in. They are in touch with the emotions of others, and truly care about people. They want to do whatever they can to help and to make a real difference in the world around them. This feeling often begins at a very young age, which will often leave the INFJ feeling completely alienated from most people around them.

They often do connect with their masculine side and enjoy having time with their male friends. The issues arise when they are around friends who are boastful and enjoy acting deplorable or obnoxious. The INFJ will often be more than willing to speak up against this behavior, especially if it is deemed as an injustice to someone else. They do best around friends who are sincere people, not simply show-offs looking to impress others.

They Keep to Themselves Most of the Time

INFJs are independent and introverted people, who enjoy plenty of time to themselves. This means that even in college or during their younger years, many INFJ males probably preferred to spend time with their favorite people, rather than go to a raging party. When they do attend these types of events they often find themselves wishing they had not gone against their better judgment. They prefer quiet time, often reading or absorbing something that they truly enjoy. This may cause the INFJ male to appear rather different than the typical outgoing, excitement driven male. This is often more of a struggle during their younger years, when it is seems important to be social and in many waysobnoxious. INFJs arenŒt like that, and would prefer to spend time focusing on real encounters.

INFJs can sometimes appear moody or distant, simply because they require time to themselves. Sometimes they are feeling drained, and need to separate themselves from others. This can be confusing, since they are actually very empathetic and warm people. They are emotionally driven, but they are also extremely logical individuals. They need time to think and process things on their own, which can throw people off sometimes. This need for alone time and space, might cause the people who care for them to become hurt. This can also be a struggle for an INFJ male, since most of the time people are expecting a man to be aggressive by nature. INFJ males are capable of going after what they want, but they arent always extremely forward and aggressive about it. They will express themselves, but they wonҒt push people if they seem resistant.

They Dislike Anything Shallow, But They Contradict Themselves

NFJs often feel out of place and like they dont fit in with many others. They are unique and rare people, especially the unbelievably rare INFJ male. They often feel disconnected from what people expect them to be, simply because they are some of the most uncommon individuals on the planet. Their way of thinking and processing their world is very different from many other people. They dislike anything shallow, and will often want to avoid the typical ғfun activities that others might enjoy. INFJs want to make real and lasting connections, and might even hate the idea of continuous one night stands. Many times this will cause the INFJ to appear odd to others, since they would prefer to let people into their lives who truly deserve to be there. They donԒt want to spend time conversing in small talk, and would much rather share in a deep meaningful conversation with others.

INFJs males enjoy aesthetics, but also hate anything shallow. They fit into the continuously baffling INFJ paradox, and will often contradict themselves to outsiders. They simply are complex people, who have a depth inside of them that is not visible to others. They do care about how they look, and might be extremely hard on themselves when it comes to appearance. At the same time they hate anything superficial, and want much more depth than most people are willing to offer.

INFJ males will often hide their less stereotypical male qualities, instead of allowing others to see them. Because of the way the world operates they might feel afraid to be completely open at a young age. This leads to a rather unhappy INFJ, since they will feel alone and completely insincere. It is vital for an INFJ to be true to themselves, so hiding in this way can be very bad for them. Feeling like they have to keep their true nature a secret, can cause them to recluse into themselves completely. They might even find themselves apathetic and incapable of operating in the world around them. When they arent allowed to be themselves and let their less common qualities shine, the INFJ is simply not being true to who they really are. It is vital for them to find people who cherish their qualities, and who appreciate how unique and special they are. When they finally do get around people like this, the INFJ simply needs to become open with themselves in order to begin to shine. If they arenҒt allowed to live up to their full potential, their incredible inner light will fade away.

They Make Incredible Partners In Life

The INFJ male might be incredibly rare, but they are also very special. They have a connection to others, and are warm but also thoughtful people. Their ability to be compassionate makes them wonderful friends and romantic partners. They have both feminine and masculine qualities, which make for an almost perfect balance- one that lets face it, we are all kind of hoping for in a partner. They possess many different qualities that can often be confusing until you dive deep into their soul to learn everything that makes them who they are. Once you are allowed into the world of an INFJ, do not take that for granted. They might have their stubborn moments, they might drive you crazy when they desire to be rebellious- but they are warm, loving and amazingly understanding people. They are hopeless romantics at heart, who sometimes desire to hide that part of themselves away. It is important to help your INFJ and keep them from hiding their light. Cherish them, and appreciate the qualities that make them so unique- they will definitely thank you for it.

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Posted by Elvis on 12/21/16 •
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Wednesday, September 07, 2016

The Ultimate Selishness Or Not?

suicide is always an option

There’s Nothing Selfish About Suicide

By Katie Hurley
Author, The Happy Kid Handbook
August 14, 2014

I am a survivor of suicide.

I don’t talk about it a lot these days, as I’ve reached the point where it feels like a lifetime ago. Healing was a long and grief-stricken process. There were times when I felt very alone in my grief and there were times when I felt lost and confused. The trouble with suicide is that no one knows what to say. No one knows how to react. So they smile and wave and attempt distraction… but they never ever say the word. The survivors, it seems, are often left to survive on their own.

I experienced endless waves of emotion in the days, weeks, months and even years following the loss of my father. The “what ifs” kept me up at night, causing me to float through each day in a state of perpetual exhaustion. What if I had answered the phone that night? Would the sound of my voice have changed his mind? Would he have done it at a later date, anyway? Survivor’s guilt, indeed.

Sometimes, I cried. Sometimes, I sat perfectly still watching the waves crash down on Main Beach, hoping for a sign of some kind that he had reached a better place. Sometimes, I silently scolded myself for not seeing the warning signs. Sometimes, I bargained with God or anyone else who might be in charge up there. Bring him back to us. Please, just bring him back. Sometimes I felt angry. Why us? Why me? Why him?

Yes, I experienced a range of emotions before making peace with the loss. But one thought that never ever (not even for one second) crossed my mind was this ill-informed opinion that suicide is selfish. Suicide is a lot of things, but selfish isn’t one of them.

SUICIDE IS A DECISION made out of DESPERATION, HOPELESSNESS, ISOLATION and LONELINESS. The black hole that is clinical depression is all-consuming. Feeling like a burden to loved ones, feeling like there is no way out, feeling trapped and feeling isolated are all common among people who suffer from depression.

People who say that suicide is selfish always reference the survivors. It’s selfish to leave children, spouses and other family members behind, so they say. They’re not thinking about the survivors, or so they would have us believe. What they don’t know is that those very loved ones are the reason many people hang on for just one more day. They do think about the survivors, probably up until the very last moment in many cases. But the soul-crushing depression that envelops them leaves them feeling like there is no alternative. Like the only way to get out is to opt out. And that is a devastating thought to endure.

Until you’ve stared down that level of depression, until you’ve lost your soul to a sea of emptiness and darkness… you don’t get to make those judgments. You might not understand it, and you are certainly entitled to your own feelings, but making those judgments and spreading that kind of negativity won’t help the next person. In fact, it will only hurt others.

As the world mourns the loss of Robin Williams, people everywhere are left feeling helpless and confused. HOW COULD someone who appeared so happy in actuality be so very depressed? The truth is that many, many people face the very same struggle each and every day. Some will commit suicide. Some will attempt. And some will hang on for dear life. Most won’t be able to ask for the help that they need to overcome their mental illness.

You can help.

Know the warning signs for suicide. 50-75% of people who attempt suicide will tell someone about their intention. Listen when people talk. Make eye contact. Convey empathy. And for the love of people everywhere, put down that ridiculous not-so-SmartPhone and be human.

Check in on friends struggling with depression. Even if they don’t answer the phone or come to the door, make an effort to let them know that you are there. Friendship isn’t about saving lost souls; friendship is about listening and being present.

Reach out to survivors of suicide. Practice using the words “suicide” and “depression” so that they roll off the tongue as easily as “unicorns” and “bubble gum.” Listen as they tell their stories. Hold their hands. Be kind with their hearts. And hug them every single time.

Encourage help. Learn about the resources in your area so that you can help friends and loved ones in need. Don’t be afraid to check in over and over again. Don’t be afraid to convey your concern. One human connection can make a big difference in the life of someone struggling with mental illness and/or survivor’s guilt.

30,000 people commit suicide in the United States each year. 750,000 people attempt suicide. It’s time to raise awareness, increase empathy and kindness, and bring those numbers down.

It’s time to talk about suicide and depression.

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Posted by Elvis on 09/07/16 •
Section Dealing with Layoff • Section Personal
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Tuesday, June 14, 2016

Can I Get PTSD From My Job

image: tormented man

Can I Get PTSD From My Job?

By Dr Z.
PTSD Spirituality
January 23, 2010

PTSD can be caused by four broad categories of trauma.  PTSD wounds our souls.  We usually think of rape or military service or natural disasters as causing PTSD.  Yet, a question I sometimes get is, “Can I get PTSD from my civilian job?” (This essay was expanded on 24 Jan 2010)

The short answer is “Yes.”

Does It Matter How I Got PTSD?

PTSD does not care how you got traumatised.  It just cares that you did get traumatised and then it tries to isolate and harm you.  If you get PTSD from a civilian employment situation, you still get to experience the same PTSD symptoms and PTSD-Identity that soldiers and veterans get.

When I listen to military veterans, rape survivors, and others, they almost all exhibit similar PTSD symptoms.  But they all got PTSD producing trauma in individual and different ways.  Hopefully, as American society matures, we will realize the point is not how did I get PTSD, but that I have PTSD.  People who have their souls wounded by PTSD, regardless of how they got it, need our prayers and compassion.  Some of them will also need medical treatment for symptoms.

Compassion Deficit Disorder

When dealing with my own PTSD, and when I help others realize they have value in spite of their PTSD, I still frequently find people (who have usually not suffered much themselves) judging what sort of trauma is worthy of PTSD and hence, their compassion.  If someone is in pain, they are worthy of our compassion.

But what about compassion deniers who themselves suffered from real trauma in their own lives?  Sometime people will suffer from COMPASSION DEFICIT disorder because when they suffered people showed them zero compassion. They were told to just get on with it, or quit whining.  That treatment added to their own suffering.  Unfortunately, they then fell into the trap of treating others with the same lack of compassion.  When we recognise someone elses suffering and can be compassionate, not only do we help them heal, but we heal a little more ourselves.

The PTSD-Identity wants to deny our own need for compassion and it denies that anyone else needs compassion.  It knows that your soul will start to heal if you allow yourself to be compassionate.

PTSD From Civilian Jobs?

f your job routinely involves trauma then you can easily acquire PTSD from your job.  Firefighters, police officers, emergency room technicians and paramedics can all be at heightened risk for PTSD.

Trauma From “Non-Emergency” Jobs?

This has more to do with the work environment, the sort of culture that the company allowed to develop. 

Employment which is high stress, high risk, or with horrible supervisors or co-workers can all cause PTSD in their ways. If your co-workers are sexist or racists, that produces stress.  If your boss is a screamer or sets you up to fail, that is also difficult to deal with.

PTSD risks beyond the job’s culture happens when trauma shows up unexpectedly.  Then PTSD can be acquired in jobs that are not normally considered as emergency work.  In fact, if your job is one that we dont expect to be stressful or traumatic, we can be caught off guard and even more easily harmed when things get horrible.  For example, a bank teller is not an emergency trauma worker.  If there is a shooting in the bank, the tellers can get PTSD.

Harrassment Can Cause PTSD

If your employment culture allows you to be harrassed, then you can get PTSD.  Work place law even recognises that verbal harrassment is a criminal offense and companies have paid substantial fines for allowing it.  Subtle discrimination on the job can also traumatize a person, especially when every job is at risk due to the profit first, people never machinations of Wall Street financiers and moving our manufacturing jobs out of the country.

Harrasment, on the job or not, is always despicable.  In some cases it will traumatise us so deeply as to wound our soul and hinder our ability to have proper relationships.

Business Uncertainty and Unemployment Are Trauma Producing

The recession can cause PTSD for some people.  The stresses of round after round of layoffs is a traumatic experience. It is traumatic to be laid off (fired?) from your job.  It is stressful and traumatic waiting to see if your name is on the next list of people who are dismissed.

Being unemployed can also cause trauma.  Applying for unemployment or welfare is stigmatized in American society.  Even if you lose your job through no fault of your own, people act as if you are a leper. And if you have kids who are members of the “Entitlement Generation,” then not having the money (or the credit) to keep them in clothes and electronics can also be traumatic.

PTSD is Not Inevitable

We are not all fated to get PTSD.  Yet, we are all at risk of being traumatized.  Knowing that it can happen and that PTSD is a normal outcome of trauma can help us more easily heal.

Regardless of how we get the soul wound of PTSD, we still need prayer and hope.  We still need compassion and forgiveness.

SOURCE

Posted by Elvis on 06/14/16 •
Section Dying America • Section Workplace • Section Spiritual Diversions • Section Personal
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Friday, November 13, 2015

Loneliness

Loneliness, layoff and loss of hope.  For the long-term unmemployed, it’s a downward spiral all tied together.

The deadly truth about loneliness

By Michelle H Lim, Lecturer and Clinical Psychologist, Swinburne University of Technology
The Conversation
November 8, 2015

Almost all of us have experienced loneliness at some point. It is the pain we have felt following a breakup, perhaps the loss of a loved one, or a move away from home. We are vulnerable to feeling lonely at any point in our lives.

Loneliness is commonly used to describe a negative emotional state experienced when there is a difference between the relationships one wishes to have and those one perceives one has.

The unpleasant feelings of loneliness are subjective; researchers have found loneliness is not about the amount of time one spends with other people or alone. It is related more to quality of relationships, rather than quantity. A lonely person feels that he or she is not understood by others, and may not think they hold meaningful relationships.

For some people, loneliness may be temporary and easily relieved (such as a close friend moving away, or a spouse returning home after a work trip). For others, loneliness cannot be easily resolved (such as the death of a loved one or the breakup of a marriage) and can persist when one does not have access to people to connect with.

From an evolutionary point of view, our reliance on social groups has ensured our survival as a species. Hence loneliness can be seen as a signal to connect with others. This makes it little different to hunger, thirst or physical pain, which signal the need to eat, drink or seek medical attention.

In affluent modern societies, however, turning off the alarm signals for loneliness has become more difficult than satisfying hunger, thirst or the need to see the doctor. For those who are not surrounded by people who care for them, loneliness can persist.

Researchers have found social isolation is a risk factor for disease and premature death. Findings from a recent review of multiple studies indicated that a lack of social connection poses a similar risk of early death to physical indicators such as obesity.

Loneliness is a risk factor for many physical health difficulties, from fragmented sleep and dementia to lower cardiovascular output.

Some individuals may also be biologically vulnerable to feeling lonely. Evidence from twin studies found that loneliness may be partly heritable.

Multiple studies have focused on how loneliness can be a result of certain gene types combined with particular social or environmental factors (such as parental support).

Loneliness has largely been ignored as a condition of concern in mental health. Researchers have yet to fully understand the extent of how loneliness affects mental health. Most studies of loneliness and mental health have focused solely on how loneliness relates to depression.

Although loneliness and depression are partly related, they are different. Loneliness refers specifically to negative feelings about the social world, whereas depression refers to a more general set of negative feelings.

In a study that measured loneliness in older adults over a five-year period, loneliness predicted depression, but the reverse was not true.
Addressing loneliness

Loneliness may be mistaken as a depressive symptom, or perhaps it is assumed that loneliness will go away once depressive symptoms are addressed. Generally, lonelyӔ people are encouraged to join a group or make a new friend, on the assumption that loneliness will then simply go away.

While creating opportunities to connect with others provides a platform for social interaction, relieving the social pain is not so straightforward. Lonely people can have misgivings about social situations and as a result show rejecting behaviours. These can be misconstrued as unfriendliness, and people around the lonely person respond accordingly. This is how loneliness can become a persistent cycle.

A study examined the effectiveness of different types of treatments aimed at addressing loneliness. The results indicated that treatments that focused on changing negative thinking about others were more effective than those that provided opportunities for social interaction.

Another promising way to tackle loneliness is to improve the quality of our relationships, specifically by building intimacy with those around us. Using a positive psychology approach that focuses on increasing positive emotions within relationships or increasing social behaviours may encourage deeper and more meaningful connections with others.

Indeed, even individuals who have been diagnosed with serious mental illness have reported improvements in their well-being and relationships after sharing positive emotions and doing more positive activities with others. However, research using a positive psychology approach to loneliness remains in its infancy.

We continue to underestimate the lethality of loneliness as a serious public health issue. Contemporary tools such as social media, while seeming to promote social connection, favour brief interactions with many acquaintances over the development of fewer but more meaningful relationships. In this climate, the challenge is to address loneliness and focus on building significant bonds with those around us.

The growing scientific evidence highlighting the negative consequences of loneliness for physical and mental health can no longer be ignored.

SOURCE

Posted by Elvis on 11/13/15 •
Section Dealing with Layoff • Section Personal
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Monday, August 31, 2015

Introverts Are Cool

10 Reasons Why Introverts Are Incredibly Attractive People

By David K. William
Lifehacker

Introverts are often thought of as shy, aloof, disinterested and “stuck up” because they keep a low profile. But that assumption couldn’t be further from the truth. Think of James Bond for a moment.

Bond doesn’t always wear his emotions on his sleeve or on his face. He is quiet, pensive, confident and driven. Do you think his demeanor makes him more or less attractive? His style makes him more attractive.

Similarly, introverts don’t center themselves as the life of the party, but they are among the most incredibly attractive and fascinating people youll ever meet. Here’s why:

1. They are mysterious.

Introverts have an mysterious aura about them. People want to know what they are thinking, but will never know all of it. This makes introverts incredibly fascinating and intimidating at the same time. It is no wonder that they are so extremely misunderstood by the more outgoing and vocal people in our society.

2. They are easy to be around.

It might surprise you, but introverts are some of the nicest and friendliest people youll ever meet. They are naturally chilled out, relaxed and loving. In a world that is always in a rush and that can’t stop talking and clamoring for the limelight, the introverts cool and laid-back nature is extremely appealing. It is true that introverts are drained by crowds, but they thrive in small groups and one-on-one interactions.

3. They are dreamers.

Despite what you may have heard, dreaming is anything but a waste of time. Psychologist Scott Barry Kaufman and colleagues explain that A MIND THAT WONDERS aids in the process of “creative incubation.” You may already know from experience that our best ideas come seemingly out of the blue when our minds are elsewhere.

Introverted people get lost in their minds often and come out of them with refreshing and wonderful ideas. When you are with them you are fascinated and feel like a part of the magic because of the way they treat you and let you in on intriguing, new possibilities.

4. They are good listeners.

It seems everyone in our extroverted world today is preoccupied with themselves and whatԒs on their own mind. Every day is like a shouting contest where everyone wants to speak and no one wants to listen. So, when someone shows an interest in another and is willing to listen, its a huge attractor. Introverts listen more than they speak. They listen with the view to understand and not merely to reply. And that is incredibly rare and special. It boosts stronger connections and healthier relationships.

5. They are intrinsically motivated.

As inwardly-oriented people, introverts tend to be intrinsically motivated. That means they are motivated to act by deeper, internal convictions rather than shallow, external motivations like reward and recognition.

They know who they are, what they want and what matters in their life. And that is why they are the ones most likely to pursue their true passions despite the risks and inconveniences involved. Anyone who is self-driven, motivated by higher values and passionate is undeniably attractive and inspiring.

6. They are observant.

Introverts see things others often miss or donҒt see. The world is an introverts wonderland with possibilities everywhere. They are constantly taking in information in their quiet state and using it as fodder for creative expression. When you are with an introvert, nothing is lost. And it often seems like the introverted person always knows what you want even when you havenҒt spelt it out, which is brilliant and endearing.

7. They are mindful of what they say.

Nothing makes you look stupid and unattractive faster than saying inappropriate things because you rushed to speak and did not take time to consider your words. Introverts dont speak out of turn. In fact, they wonҒt speak at all unless they have something important to say. And when they do speak, they say just enough to pique your interest and leave you wanting more. The more they speak the more fascinated you become and the more you want to hear them speak.

8. They are creative, out-of-the box thinkers.

According to studies by the psychologists MILHALY CSIKSZENTMILALYI and Gregory Feist, the most spectacularly creative people in many fields are often introverted. Thats largely because solitude is a key ingredient for creative success. Introverts have no fear of being alone. They actually cherish privacy and freedom from interruption. In the state of solitude, introverts get in touch with their inner monologue, ask the right questions and flex their creative muscles.

That natural tendency to embrace solitude, focus deeply on a subject, think and act creatively makes introverts, past and present, gloriously remarkable and attractive people.

9. They are studious and smart.

Introverts are naturally drawn to reading and study. They enjoy learning and figuring out new things for themselves. And while they might be dubbed book worms, they are smart. And a smart person is sexy and attractive. You are better off spending time with someone whoҒs knowledgeable and eagerly interested in learning more, than someone who is ignorant and disinterested.

10. They are intellectually stimulating.

Because introverts are studious and self-reflective, their conversations are intellectually stimulating. They know all kinds of things to share with others. And there is something magical and beautiful about someone who lights up and is energized by meaningful, intelligent conversations.

SOURCE

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10 Things Only Outgoing Introverts Would Understand

By Robert Locke
Lifehacker

Introvert or extrovert? Think of it as a spectrum where you will rarely be at one end or the other. Most people, researchers say, tend to be somewhere in the middle. They are called ambiverts. Outgoing introverts are certainly in that position but people rarely understand this and expect people to be either one or the other. The outgoing introvert knows this only too well. Here are 10 things that they will resonate with because life is not so simple.

1. They feel that extroversion is overdone in our society.

They may have done group work at school and team work when employed, but they feel that quieter time for reflection and the ability to work by themselves should be more valued in the workplace. They cannot always work in a group or together.

2. They can be the life and soul of the party.

Outgoing introverts can be chatty, exuberant, funny and great company at a party. They will be completely drained afterwards and may not want to see anyone for a few hours or days!

3. They can make excellent sales persons.

Tradition has it that an extrovert is the ideal person to clinch the sale, but the outgoing introvert has a lot going for them in the sales world it seems. They know when they should keep quiet and when they should push. They are also pretty good at tuning into a clients needs and
preferences.

4. They do not enjoy proms.

Being forced to take part in certain rites of passage such as proms is a real turn off for many outgoing introverts. They would much prefer to stay at home and read a book.

5. They prefer social media.

Social media has helped many an outgoing introvert to cope with all the shenanigans. It is sufficiently social while allowing for quiet downtime with no chatty interruptions. They do not have to move too far from their comfort zone. ItҒs an ideal combination acting social and being alone!

6. They prefer to be left alone sometimes.

This sometimes causes upset when they start to date. They can be chatty and great company but then they may seem to withdraw into themselves because they do not answer texts or calls. The fact is that their social batteries need recharging and this has to be done alone.

7. They don’t use their phones all the time.

One thing you notice about these introverts is that they are deeply focused and they cannot flit from one chatty remark to a text or a phone call. Listening and talking are just not compatible with their deep thinking and concentration.

8. They pick and choose their social events.

Going out may mean a lot of small talk and that can be pretty meaningless. Yes, they enjoy company and social outings but you can bet that they will be pretty choosy when doing so. Other social occasions are sometimes risky and tricky for them. They may go with the flow or they may appear withdrawn.

9. They value their introversion highly.

Silence and moments of quiet are often regarded negatively. Yet, these qualities have led to great discoveries and advanced our civilization for centuries. The outgoing introvert regards his introversion as a great strength and is perfectly content to be that way. They get very angry when people start to imply that there is something wrong with them!

10. They find it hard to adapt.

Problems arise when they are expected to be outgoing all the time and perform as if they were circus clowns. They have to do this to get a job, make friends or network. They know what society demands and expects. It is not always easy to switch on extroversion like a light.

Its great being an outgoing introvert but wouldn’t it be wonderful if people understood them a bit more?

SOURCE

Posted by Elvis on 08/31/15 •
Section Personal
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Buddhism has the characteristics of what would be expected in a cosmic religion for the future: it transcends a personal God, avoids dogmas and theology; it covers both the natural & spiritual, and it is based on a religious sense aspiring from the experience of all things as a meaningful unity. - Albert Einstein

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